As soon as I read the headline, a thousand thoughts went through my mind.
Did I buy enough bulbs this spring for fall planting? People are hoarding bulbs. Why are they hoarding flower bulbs? Do they know something I don’t know? Is there a shortage of bulbs this fall? Maybe I should go buy some more now? People are hoarding bulbs. Should I send emails to make sure the bulbs I pre-ordered in the spring are really going to be shipped to me this fall? Oh, dear. I need to let other gardeners know. But should I wait until after I’ve made sure I have enough bulbs to tell them? After all people are hoarding bulbs. What do they know that I don’t know?
Then I finished reading the rest of the headline.
Oh, they are hoarding light bulbs. Well, never mind then. Whew. That was a close call. Really, seriously, who would hoard flower bulbs. It seems ridiculous to even consider.
But then again, maybe I should double-check on those spring flowering bulbs I pre-ordered? I’m sure when I ordered them in the spring, I thought I was ordering enough. Now I’m not so sure. I think I’ll need a few more. After all, every spring when the bulbs come up, I never think I have enough of them.
Yes, I should pretend like I didn’t pre-order bulbs this spring and go ahead and get some more. Yes, that’s exactly what I should do, just in case…
Yes, Dr. Hortfreud? What a surprise to hear from you.
Carol, I’m here because you seem a bit traumatized by this bulb article, and it isn’t even about flower bulbs.
Well, wouldn’t it scare you if you thought there weren’t going to be enough flower bulbs to go around this fall?
Maybe a little, but I think you’ve gone a bit overboard. Why don’t you go look at your pre-orders and see what you have coming before you go off and buy even more bulbs?
Dr. Hortfreud, that sounds like a good idea, a very practical suggestion. But I’m still going to buy more bulbs.
Carol, if it weren’t for the confidentiality of our sessions, I think I have enough material to write an article about real bulb hoarders. I think I know one…
You do? Who?