It’s that time of year when I usually discover the one Easter egg that no one found on Easter.
But this year, I didn’t discover it.
Instead I saw the sparkle of the candy wrapper and thought it was just a piece of trash leftover from Easter… until I saw the open egg and the four quarters left on the ground nearby.
This means someone(thing) else discovered it! Who?
Let’s examine the evidence so far!
Whoever or whatever does not care a wit for money. They left the quarters.
Whoever or whatever was able to open the egg!
Whoever or whatever knew to tear open the candy wrapper to eat the chocolate.
Whoever or whatever didn’t care that they didn’t clean up after themselves or hide the evidence of their thievery.
Now, let’s look at our list of suspects!
Was it the Halloween Hare?
Surely not! Though I found the candy wrapper near the spruce tree, which in my imagination hides the warren of the Halloween Hare, I cannot image him looking for Easter candy a full five months before Halloween.
(What? Halloween Hare? You don’t know who I’m talking about? I suggest you read the book!)
Was it a bird? I doubt it. If a bird found an egg under a tree, they would just sit on it and see if it hatches. And birds don’t eat chocolate, as far as I know.
Was it the feral cat who considers my garden his (or her) personal playground?
I’m guessing from the look on that cat’s face that I’ve insulted him by even imagining that he would stoop so low as to eat stale chocolate from an Easter egg that has been outside since, well, Easter. He might be feral but he has certain standards in what he eats.
Was it a rabbit? The rabbits are too busy eating clover in the lawn and eyeing those green bean seedlings in the garden to waste their time on stale chocolate.
Was it garden fairies? I shall not even suggest the garden fairies were involved because to falsely accuse them of mischief they weren’t involved in is nothing more than an invitation for them to engage in some shenanigans that could cause me all manner of problems.
So that leaves only one suspect…
It was probably a raccoon! A raccoon would be able to open up an Easter egg. A raccoon would eat stale chocolate. A raccoon would not care about cleaning up any messes they made. And a raccoon wouldn’t care about the money.
This is clearly and open and shut case, as they say.
Now, if someone could please find and remove the raccoon, I would be forever grateful. I cannot have it eating up any other un-found Easter candy before the Halloween Hare gets his chance to look for it in a mere five months, on Halloween.