Eight Types of Mowing

If you like to mow your lawn, as I do, you’ll probably recognize the eight types of mowing I’m about to describe.

If you don’t like to mow your lawn, you might be surprised to find out that there are so many different types of mowing.

In either case, you may be tempted to click away now because… eight types of mowing? Do you even need such information?

But I encourage you to keep reading and avoid the risk of continuing your life bereft of the knowledge of the eight types of mowing.

It’s your choice!

In no particular order, here are the eight types of mowing:

1. Mowing to fill time while procrastinating. I dubbed this type of mowing “Mow-crastinating.” This is when you have some pressing matters that you should attend to, but you don’t want to, so you procrastinate by mowing the lawn. “Lawns can’t wait,” you say to anyone who might wonder why you are mowing with so many other pressing items to take care of. A sure way to know if you are mow-crastinating is if you are also thinking about those things you really should be doing instead of mowing, like making phone calls, fixing dinner, paying bills, etc.
2. Mowing to avoid doing something you don’t want to do is avoidance mowing, or as I like to call it, “mow-avoidance.” “Mow-voidance” is similar to mow-crastinating, but instead of just putting off something you’ll eventually do, you are avoiding something you are likely never going to do. “I couldn’t possibly go to lunch with you because I have to wash my hair, mow the lawn.” This can also be called “mow-cusing”, when you use the need to mow as an excuse to get out of something else.
3. When you use mowing as a way to block out the world and think about or meditate on something, that’s called “mow-ditation.” You mow to give yourself some undisturbed “me” time to think about whatever you want to think about, while being outside in nature. Ommmm…the rhythmic sound of the mower helps to put you in a mowditative state, doesn’t it?
4. When you are pondering the solution to a problem, that’s called “mow-dering.” Yes, it is similar to mow-ditation, except instead of meditating upon something, you are pondering a problem or situation. “It is solved by mowing.” Or in Latin, solvitur falcatione, similar to that oft-used statement, “It is solved by walking,” which in Latin is solvitur ambulando. While mowing, you can think through options and come up with solutions for many kinds of problems. You might also be mow-dering if you are thinking of a list of all the different types of mowing while actually mowing..
5. When your grass doesn’t really need to be cut, but you mow it anyway, anticipating that it will soon need to be mowed, that’s called “anticimowtory mowing.” It is better to anticimowtory mow rather than risk letting the lawn grow too long. (In the world of mowing, there is no term for mowing the lawn well after it should have been cut, as this is an unthinkable situation to find yourself in!)
6. Another type of mowing is when you hear your neighbor mowing, so you decide to mow too, without thinking about whether or not your lawn needs to be cut. This is to show empathy for them, to show camaraderie, to show that you aren’t going to let their lawn be the only freshly cut lawn on the street. One might call this kind of mowing “mowpathy.” Mowpathy mowing is similar to anticimowtory mowing, except instead of anticipating rain or some other event, you mow because the neighbor mowed. In some circles, they may call this type of mowing, “comowraderie.”
7. When you mow for exercise, we call that “mowercizing.” Yes, you can use mowing for this purpose, and it is a wise use of time. You are getting your steps in for the day while cutting your lawn. Win-win. And depending on how hard your mower is to push, you may also no longer need to buy fancy weights or a gym membership to tone your muscles or do a good cardio workout. However, it goes without saying that you can not mowercize with a riding lawn mower.
8. Finally, when you don’t want to be mowing, but you mow anyway, we call this type of mowing “mowgrudgily mowing.” It is sometimes done by teenagers who are told they must mow the lawn, but by the time you become an adult and realize how nice it is to have your own lawn, you should never “mowgrudgily mow.” It upsets the lawn! I sincerely hope this is a rare type of mowing for you, but if you find it is a common type, may I suggest you hire someone to mow the lawn for you?

So there you have, the eight types of mowing! Let’s wrap this up with the answers to some common questions.

Are there other types of mowing? Not that I’m aware of, but I will mow to find out! Solvitur falcatione! It is solved by mowing.

How should you use this knowledge of the types of mowing? The next time you head out the door to mow your lawn, think about what type of mowing you are doing. If you find you are always doing one type of mowing, I encourage you to mix it up so that your mowing can be as varied as possible. That keeps you from getting bored and turns everyday mowing into something you’ll enjoy each and every time.

If you got to the end of this post and are going out to mow your lawn now, let me know what type of mowing you’ll be doing!